I am seeking representation forScruffball and Grumpy Face: The Curry Catastrophe – a feline comedy for 7-9s, complete at 14,000 words.
When a chicken curry robbery goes wrong, alley cat criminals Scruffball and Grumpy Face are sent to ‘prison’ (ie. the cat rescue centre). They meet the Long-timers – cats which nobody wants to adopt – who tell them awful tales of human catnappers. There follows a series of wacky escape plans, which all end in catastrophe. The alley cats finally escape with help from the Long-timers, only to discover that their alley has been taken over by gigantic pirate seagulls…
Narrated by the self-styled ‘greatest cat burglars this side of Fat Rat Hill’, Scruffball and Grumpy Facedoes for cats, what Dave Pigeondoes for pigeons. Scruffball is the leader; daring, adventurous and full of cataclysmically good ideas. According to her. Grumpy Face is an opera singing yoga guru, whose hilarious poses come in handy when trying to outwit prison guards or sneaky seagulls.
After more than a decade living and working in London in various marketing roles, I moved to West Sussex a couple of years ago with my husband and two young children. I’m a member of SCBWI and in 2018, was awarded a distinction in the MA Writing for Children from the University of Winchester. I’m now a freelance writer and spend my spare time renovating a dilapidated Georgian house and learning to play the saxophone.
Thank you for your time and I look forward to hearing from you.
Hi, I’m Scruffball and this is the true story of the bravest, cleverest feline on four legs – me! (Oedipuss is possibly brainier, but he only has three legs these days.)
Grumpy Face (speech bubble): Ahem, aren’t you forgetting someone?
Me: I’m just getting to that bit, Grumpy Face
This is the story of that time I was catnapped and sent to prison. Then a gigantic, hairy sea monster breaks into the prison and grows some wings and flies me to a desert island. There, we discover an X in the sand and we dig and we dig until we find a treasure chest. Inside the chest there are gold coins and sparkling jewels and a juicy salmon the size of a whale and a catnip plant that lives forever and a…
Grumpy Face (speech bubble): Um, Scruffball. It didn’t happen quite like that.
Me: Oh, but this is much more fun!
Grumpy Face: It isn’t supposed to be fun. If you make bits up, it isn’t a TRUE story.
Me: Fine, but if nobody likes it, I’ll tell another one about finding the treasure
Let’s start again. This is the true story of that time I was catnapped and sent to prison. It’s not as exciting as that time I wasn’tflown to a desert island by a hairy sea monster and didn’tdiscover the treasure chest of my catty dreams. But I’ll do my best to make it as fun as possible.
Oh, and my friend Grumpy Face was there too.
Chapter 1 Operation Caterwaul
It was the day of the Great Chicken Curry Robbery. That’s when our lives changed forever.
We’d done lots of robberies before, Grumpy Face and me. We were cat partners in crime. But this time, it went a bit wrong. Actually, it went a lot wrong. It was a CAT-astrophe! It was the Cattiest Catastrophe known to Catkind.
The day had started well. Grumpy Face always starts the day with yoga:
The Forward Facing Feline
And her favourite…ThePot Plant
I joined in with my Sleeping Catpose. I’m not so good at yoga, but I’m very good at the Sleeping Cat.
After all that hard work, it was time for breakfast.
Grumpy Face and I were just searching through the bins behind the fish and chip shop, like we did every morning. We found a few soggy chips and a couple of fish tails. Not exactly a banquet, but you take what you find when you’re an alley cat.
Man in the Cardboard Box was still asleep at the other end of Fish and Chip Alley. His old, flea-bitten dog lay across his legs, keeping him warm. Sometimes, Man in the Cardboard Box gives us treats like sour milk or a mouldy sausage. In return, we share the odd mouse with him. He never eats the mice, but I think he likes our presents all the same. He says they’re the only presents he ever gets.